When our family first started this adoption, we thought we'd have Wisly home in a year and a half, maybe two. Obviously that didn't happen. As far as we know, we still haven't entered MOI, the next significant adoption step. We are currently over three years in and realize it will likely be several more months before we are united forever. I know that point has been mentioned a few times already on this blog.. ;-) I hope I don't come across as whining. I'm really not trying to.
Is this process bumpy and sometimes infuriating? Yes.
Is Haiti doing it's best as a country to create an open, ethical and (eventually) streamlined process to finds kids homes? Certainly.
Is Wisly worth every minute, every month, every year working to get him home?
Emphatically, Yes. He is our son as surely as the two sweet girls we tuck into bed every night.
Emphatically, Yes. He is our son as surely as the two sweet girls we tuck into bed every night.
When we first started the adoption, the required 15 day socialization visit was not part of the referral process. It was an unexpected, added expense. Yet God provided the funds, and the visit with our boy was AMAZING.
For those of you new to the blog-- we had a little "relational assistance" ahead of time. Even though we knew *about* Wisly before we traveled for our 2 week visit, we had never actually met. When the creche officially matched us to him in the summer of 2013, we sent our first care package that December. Over the next 14 months via the blessing of social media and other moms who traveled to Haiti and knew Wisly, he and I became Pen Pals of sorts. Having those connections enabled us to feel like we knew each other before we ever met! (Note: Under Haiti's new adoption laws and the Hague system, adoptive parents are not allowed to interact or meet "their" kids before the 15 day bonding visit.)
After our trip, elements of the process continued to change and the process dragged on. Eric and I acknowledged that it could be a couple more years before our boy would be home. It was a difficult realization.
For those of you new to the blog-- we had a little "relational assistance" ahead of time. Even though we knew *about* Wisly before we traveled for our 2 week visit, we had never actually met. When the creche officially matched us to him in the summer of 2013, we sent our first care package that December. Over the next 14 months via the blessing of social media and other moms who traveled to Haiti and knew Wisly, he and I became Pen Pals of sorts. Having those connections enabled us to feel like we knew each other before we ever met! (Note: Under Haiti's new adoption laws and the Hague system, adoptive parents are not allowed to interact or meet "their" kids before the 15 day bonding visit.)
After our trip, elements of the process continued to change and the process dragged on. Eric and I acknowledged that it could be a couple more years before our boy would be home. It was a difficult realization.
Having adopted twice previously -- our precious China and Taiwan Princesses -- we understood the important challenges of working on bonding, attachment, trust, security. Now, with an older child, and particularly one who has lived so many years in an institutional setting, building a healthy relationship with him and providing an environment where he can heal and grow is even more pressing. Before we even traveled home from our socialization trip, Eric and I both knew one of us would return to see him before the adoption was complete. Seeing glimpses of his personality and true heart -- often hidden by an overly confident attitude and gruff voice -- revealed his insecurity and tremendous desire for a family. We knew that visiting him again would bring assurance of our love and commitment as well as build bonds that would eventually transfer to an easier and healthier transition into a family. Continuing correspondence with him has confirmed his ongoing need for us to be there with him in Haiti.
Our family HAS been incredibly blessed to visit Wisly every few months! These visits, just like the socialization visit, were not planned at the front end of the process, nor were they expected financially. Yet these visits have become an integral part of this adoption process. And each time, our faithful God has made a way and provided the funds needed! Every few months, Eric and I discussed, considered and prayed about which one of us should go. The decision God brought us to each and every time, as a couple, is that the person Wisly needed to see was his mama. The details are not something to share in a blog post. You'll just have to trust us on this one. :-) And...we trust God knows what He is doing as He puts our family together, one step at a time!
NOW BACK TO MY FUN NEWS!!
I am going back to Haiti...in May...to surprise Wisly for his 9th birthday!!
And I am bringing our 9 year old daughter Noelle to meet him!! She is over the moon!
It keeps getting better-- A friend of mine (a fellow pastor's wife) and her teenage daughter are going with us!! Their first time in Haiti!
And more good news-- Through the recent donations from a couple friends from church and some family members, our trip is nearly paid for!! Isn't that crazy-awesome?!
When you least suspect it, God surprises you with a tremendous gift and uses His people to do it!! (Thank you DEAR friends...we can never thank you enough <3 )
Well, this has been a long post. So I'll quit now and give you more details as the trip gets closer. Thank you for reading. And as always, thank you for your prayers. TTFN ~Jennifer
Our family HAS been incredibly blessed to visit Wisly every few months! These visits, just like the socialization visit, were not planned at the front end of the process, nor were they expected financially. Yet these visits have become an integral part of this adoption process. And each time, our faithful God has made a way and provided the funds needed! Every few months, Eric and I discussed, considered and prayed about which one of us should go. The decision God brought us to each and every time, as a couple, is that the person Wisly needed to see was his mama. The details are not something to share in a blog post. You'll just have to trust us on this one. :-) And...we trust God knows what He is doing as He puts our family together, one step at a time!
NOW BACK TO MY FUN NEWS!!
I am going back to Haiti...in May...to surprise Wisly for his 9th birthday!!
And I am bringing our 9 year old daughter Noelle to meet him!! She is over the moon!
It keeps getting better-- A friend of mine (a fellow pastor's wife) and her teenage daughter are going with us!! Their first time in Haiti!
And more good news-- Through the recent donations from a couple friends from church and some family members, our trip is nearly paid for!! Isn't that crazy-awesome?!
When you least suspect it, God surprises you with a tremendous gift and uses His people to do it!! (Thank you DEAR friends...we can never thank you enough <3 )
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| Wisly, Summer 2013 |
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| Wisly, Summer 2013 |
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